I remember once 
I took a picture of my freshly laundered underwear, lying on my red bed 
I thought it was cute cause the colours matched and 
they looked like art just lying there, 
doing nothing, 
being picturesque 

It was art too but I couldn’t share it with you 
what if you didn’t see what I did and you thought it strange,
or cuckoo?
What if you thought they were,
silly or dirty or I was mentally ill ,
and should be called an 
‘exhibitionist’,
I can hear you yelling,
“Are you looking for cheap thrills?”

What if I showed you and it made me feel, ashamed?

Yes Shame. 
We feel it everyday, 
We’re ashamed, in our skin, and our bones and the hollowed out cavities we call our lungs, and our moans 
It’s the creepy crawly that’s hidden 
in the dark corners at home,
Locked away, all alone 
to twist and contort, 
till we can’t ignore 

And so I ran. 
Till I forgot all about it and it became, redundant. 
But it’s still so, relevant. 
I think it’s time I showed some, reverence. 

What a Shame.
I don’t want to hide (it) anymore.

I’ll let it out. Let it out and let it dance,
a dirty dance on the floor
Maybe wearing the underwear I photographed and couldn’t share,
But no more, 
shame.!
I’ll put it up here 
For those who can see into
the depths of what we call-
The human experience

All of it
Not just the shiny parts that make you feel like you’re always on top of it
But those ugly feelings that make you go all the way under it, 
deep inside it, all around and all over it

So we can make love to the demons (gods?) 
that watch over the wastelands of our 
treasure islands? 
-pure gold. 

Yes I said it. I’ll wiggle in it -
The shame.
Till we become friends 
And we sit on the grass together
Side by side
Staring up at the same blue sky, and  while we count stars and catch clouds we’ll make amends -
For misunderstanding, 
each other, 
And all the quick hiding and name calling and blame gaming,
and blackmailing and withdrawing …

I’ll look into your eyes
And I won’t, look away
I’ll look with love, deep, 
into my Shame, and yours

Till we can See 
And not be ashamed
By who we are and who we’ve always been and are meant to be

Till we can See,
God! I wanna see!,
And not look away
From seeing God, who
we’ve kept hiding all along,
When we hid the Shame.

Roshini Suha Cath